Whether you are still seeking for a big change in your life or you have already formulated the perfect strategy in doing so, we must all agree that finding the top secret to your success has never been easy. There will always be drawbacks, hindrances, flaws, and people that will try to burn the fire out of your passion and hard work to the extent that you are blaming your decisions as to why you can’t seem to progress. Poor decision-making can be a factor, but so are the people whom you surround yourself with; that is why it is important to have a circle of supportive people that keep you positive, relaxed and worthy. And, sure enough, everybody would totally agree to this.
But would you believe that researchers took a step further into this affirmation and claims that your success also depends on whom you decide to spend your lifetime with? According to a study published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin by the Carnegie Mellon University, decisions are greatly influenced by spouses and it can heavily contribute to success or failure. Further into the investigation, they discovered that people with supportive spouses are “more likely to give themselves the chance to succeed.”
How is it possible, you may ask? Well, there are two main points that you should keep in mind. Read further and know the reason as to why the top secret to your success is who you marry:
1. People with supportive partners tend to accept more challenging tasks.
Feeny, together with his co-proponents proved a point in this topic by bringing 163 married couples into the lab and gave one member of each couple a choice to either solve a simple puzzle or compete for a prize. According to the researchers’ observations, participants with encouraging partners decided to compete. On the other hand, those with partners who discouraged them showed a lack of confidence and chose to solve a simple puzzle instead. After several months, the researchers did a follow-up on the same couples and found out that those who pursued the more challenging task are reported to have more personal growth, happiness, psychological well-being, and better relationships than those who picked the easier puzzle.
This notable experiment of making couples choose between an easy puzzle versus a more crucial one depicts how they approach a real-life opportunity. The proponents discovered that the most supportive partners oblige their significant other to take the risk, have shown enthusiasm, and reassured them about the potential benefits of making extra efforts by accepting a tough challenge. The choices that people make matters a lot when it comes to long-term well-being, whether it may be pursuing a career opportunity, making new friends, and the like. Always be a supportive partner and seek for a significant other who does the same, because as Feeny affirms:
“Significant others can help you thrive through embracing life opportunities. Or they can hinder your ability to thrive by making it less likely that you’ll pursue opportunities for growth.”
Be the former. Be a companion, not a person who confines their partners into a place where they wouldn’t grow.
2. Your significant other is the top secret to your success, as proven by the world’s best power couples.
What makes a ‘power’ couple so mighty and inspirational that spouses often wish that their relationship with their significant other were similar to them? Let’s take some of the iconic couples into account such as Barrack and Michelle Obama, Mark Zuckerberg and Pricilla Chan, and of course Jay-Z and Beyonce. As you can see, each couple is unique; they hail from different backgrounds and dwell in their choice of career. However, amidst the diversity, they all agree to one thing: they wouldn’t be able to establish a successful life without their spouse.
Former U.S President Barrack Obama attributes his accomplishments to his wife, Michelle. As he stated in his 2011 interview with Oprah:
“Obviously I couldn’t have done anything that I’ve done without Michelle. You were asking earlier what keeps me sane, what keeps me balanced, what allows me to deal with the pressure. It is this young lady right here… Not only has she been a great first lady, she is just my rock. I count on her in so many ways every single day.”
Facebook CEO, Mark Zuckerberg then stressed the role of his wife Pricilla Chan in a 2017 Harvard commencement speech. Zuckerberg stated that Chan inspired him to volunteer and take on social work.
Women are known to be a vessel of support for their spouses, but men also play a vital role in their significant other’s life just like how Jay-Z supports RnB music powerhouse Beyonce in ‘so many levels’ and made her say:
“I would not be the woman I am if I did not go home to that man. It just gives me such a foundation.”
Now, back to the question: What makes a ‘power’ couple so mighty and inspirational that spouses often wish that their relationship with their significant other were similar to them? It makes them strong not just as couples but also individually because of the level of empowerment they provide, and that is their only secret.
We all have heard the saying: “Behind every successful man is a good woman.” This can also be true for women. A supportive partner brings such a wonderful feeling. They have a very powerful energy that keeps you striving for that goal even if sometimes it seems impossible. And that is the top secret to your success.
Aside from making you be more prosperous, it makes you realize all the efforts that you are putting into your work, you become more passionate, appreciative, and you become happier about your achievements.
As they say, “Success feels less if you don’t have anyone to share it with.” And the best person to share it through thick or thin is nobody but your own spouse.
Sources: 2011 Clip Of The Obamas Talking About Their Marriage Will Make You Miss Them Even More These psychologists say that the secret to your success is who you marry
Hey there, Martha here, a full-time mom of two, currently trying to bring a small impact in everyone’s life whom I can reach through The Queen Momma. I usually write on topics related to parenting, pregnancy and motherhood. Having gone through a few rocky relationships myself, I consider myself somewhat of an “expert” on topics related to dating and relationships.
I formerly worked at Special Needs Network Inc and BrightStar Care of Beverly Hills as a head manager. I have a passion for assisting organizations and individuals in achieving their objectives and have had the opportunity to do so throughout my professional career. At present, writing for The Queen Momma is a great addition to my professional career.
4 thoughts on “The Top Secret to Your Success is Who You Marry”
Great post! I have always thought this so it is interesting to know that it has actually been proven!
I so need to find a partner this time round who is supportive! Makes all the difference!
This is a really interesting blog post with a lot of good points! I look forward to sharing this with my couples!